There are two main tenets to the new approach to parenting developed in the book: emotional support and limit setting. It takes about 20 years to raise a child. Within that 20 years, the author believes, you will have taught - or led your child towards the teaching of all the skills they will need to function in the world away from home. The first responsibility of parents is to give children emotional support so that they will have the courage to have the experiences and do the learning that they need to become emotionally independent adults. The second responsibility is to set suitable boundaries and expectations so that they can safely tread the path from undisciplined babies to self-disciplined adults.